What is a Good Mom, Anyway?

As I sit here writing while my child “naps” (please go to sleep moody toddler!), I wonder what makes someone a good mom?  I have been feeling like a crappy mom lately for reasons that don’t even make sense.  How do some moms do it all?  How do these Super Moms keep the house clean, play with their kids, and have dinner on the table every night?  What in the world am I doing wrong?!  Nothing!  Of course, I am not perfect, I make mistakes, but I am not a bad mom. 

Are you a good mom if you make dinner every night?  Yes

Are you a good mom if you don’t make dinner every night?  Yes

Are you a good mom if you feed your kids all organic food?  Yes

Are you a good mom if your kids ate fast food for dinner every night last week? Yes

Are you a good mom if you work outside the home? Yes

Are you a good mom if you stay home with your kids? Yes

Are you a good mom if you play with your kids every day? Yes

Are you a good mom if you don’t play with your kids every day? Yes

Are you a good mom if you bathe your kids every day? Yes

Are you a good mom if your kids had a bath last week… maybe? Yes

A few people have told me, “If you’re worried about being a good mom, you’re probably a good mom.”  Bad moms don’t care if they’re good moms or not.  Good moms care for their children. 

Sometimes, I think about how much I love M.J.  I love him so much just because he’s my son.  It reminds me of how much God loves me just because I’m his daughter. 

“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.  God is love.  Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.”  1st John 4:16 NIV

I am often guilty of comparing myself to other moms. I will see a mom friend who does wonderful crafts with her kids and think, “Why can’t I be like her?”  I suck at crafts.  But really, who cares that crafts are not my area of expertise?  Certainly not my 2 year old who would normally rather run around like a maniac than do crafts anyway.  I will see moms who cook dinner for their kids every night and think, “Why can’t I do that?”  But hey, I am blessed to have a husband who is an AWESOME cook.  He isn’t able to cook every night so I will try to cook, but I also take M.J. out to eat… a lot.  He has pouches for dinner… a lot.  Sometimes I feel bad about it, but he never complains.  He loves going out to eat.  He loves pouches.  I realized the other day when we were eating at a restaurant that he is pretty well-behaved for a two-year old.  I thought, “Hey, I guess there are benefits to going out to eat all the time.”  M.J. loves me and right now he thinks I am a great mom.  God chose me to be M.J.’s mom and I am so glad I have been blessed with him.  God chose you to be your children’s mom and you are the best mom for them.  The next time I feel like a bad mom, I am going to try to remember I am the best mom for my son.

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”  Psalm 139:13-14

Published by rachel.ermutlu@gmail.com

Christian. Wife. Mom. I just want to share my journey of motherhood and let struggling moms know they're not alone. I enjoy reading, playing board games, spending time with friends and family, and volunteering in the community.

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