Do your kids every annoy you?  Oh good.  So glad I’m not the only one.  M.J. interrupted my shower at least three times this morning because his show wasn’t working.  “Kid, you have a ton of toys, just play with them!”  He also asked for another bagel and then said he couldn’t eat it because I turned off his show.  I started feeling guilty that I had maybe been letting him watch too much to TV lately.   I’m really not a morning person so when he asks to watch TV while he eats his breakfast it sounds like a nice way to relax.  He is also not very good at listening lately so that of course stresses me out.  I try to remember, I never expected to parent during a pandemic.  2020 has been a hard year for everyone.  I need to remember to have grace with myself.

“In a year like 2020, you’re not allowed to feel guilty for ditching your previous parenting rules.  Your kids get more screen time than you ever imagined allowing? Great.  Routines have been tossed out?  Great.  Cereal is now a fancy meal.  Great.  Nothing to feel bad about.”- Kristina Kuzmic

I feel like I am so behind on all the housework.  I have so much laundry that needs to be folded.  Our bathrooms really need to be cleaned.  I really need to vacuum.  I also have so much reading and writing I want to do.  I feel guilty if I don’t play with M.J. all day but I also feel guilty if I don’t get any housework done.  Then if I try to read a book or write I feel even guiltier.  Oh, yeah I also have to fit all my neck stretches in which can be a challenge.  M.J. loves to climb on me while I do my stretches so that makes it a little stressful.  I have to remind myself self-care is essential to be a good mom.  Doing my neck stretches is important for my physical health.  Reading and writing are important for my mental health.  I have to remember it is not possible to play with my son all day.  No matter how much housework I get done there will still be more (sadly). 

I am so thankful I have friends who remind me being a mom is hard and tell me I’m a good mom.  Especially when I don’t feel like it.  Yesterday, M.J. and I went to lunch with a friend.  M.J. was very upset when we left because he needed to “eat his juice and chips” (he hadn’t been eating them he just decided he needed to when it was time to leave.)  My friend offered to carry my stuff so I could carry M.J.  It was pretty embarrassing to carry my screaming kid out of the restaurant but I guess it happens sometimes.  While he was throwing a horrible tantrum and I was trying to put him in the car my friend told me, “You’re a good mom.”  I was really stressed out but that made me feel good.  And I actually believed her.  A few months ago if someone had told me I was a good mom while my kid was screaming about juice and chips I would have thought, No, I’m not.  But since I have grown in my faith and learned to have grace with myself I remember I am not perfect.  My toddler isn’t perfect.  It’s normal for him to get upset when he doesn’t get his way.  I mean, I know I get upset sometimes when I don’t get my way.  This happens all the time for 3 year olds.  I’m not a bad mom.  I have a normal child.  It’s normal to get frustrated when your kid has a tantrum. Especially if it’s about something you feel is ridiculous.  And it often is. 

My faith, therapy, and encouragement from other moms remind me that I am a good mom.  Of course, I am not perfect, but no one is.  I love my kid so much and that’s what matters.  I try to show him God’s love and encourage him to show love to others.  He is such a sweet kid even if he throws tantrums about orange juice.  Remember, you’re a good mom, too.

You let your kids watch TV all day

You’re a good mom

They had donuts for breakfast yesterday

You’re a good mom

You don’t know what to make for dinner

You’re a good mom

You constantly feel like you’re a beginner

You’re a good mom

Your anxiety riddles you with self-doubt

You’re a good mom

Why can’t you figure this parenting thing out?

You’re a good mom

When did they last have a bath?

You’re a good mom

Even when they drive you nuts

You’re a good mom

You love your kids no matter what

You’re a GOOD mom

Published by rachel.ermutlu@gmail.com

Christian. Wife. Mom. I just want to share my journey of motherhood and let struggling moms know they're not alone. I enjoy reading, playing board games, spending time with friends and family, and volunteering in the community.

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