Sometimes I wonder if I am a good mom. Specifically when my kid is throwing a tantrum about something ridiculous. Or when he hasn’t been listening to me all day. When I have no idea how to get him to listen to me. Sometimes I feel guilty because I don’t feel like dealing with him anymore so I will say, “Whatever, do whatever you want. Just don’t bug me.” Parenting a 3 year old can be hard. They love to test boundaries. Hmmm… mom doesn’t want me to do this. What about this? It can be difficult because I know part of it is just learning. But I also think he wants to see what he’s able to get away with. However; it is important to notice the good qualities our kids have as well.
The other day I tripped over something outside. I got a few bruises. M.J. asked me where my owie was. I said, “Um, right here, right here, right here.” A few days later- when M.J. and I were walking over the thing I tripped over- he said, “Here, Mommy, I’ll hold your hand so you don’t get owies.” I was reminded I have such a loving child. Yes, he gets mad when things don’t go his way but, I mean, who doesn’t? He is so loving to others. I feel that he already has a great deal of empathy at a young age.
“Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people.”- Mr. Rogers
Sometimes, when we are struggling with parenting, it can be difficult to remember our kid’s strengths. I love how empathetic M.J. is. He is also very outgoing. He loves playing with everyone. I’m sometimes worried he comes on a little strong because he loves people so much. I love people, but I’m a lot less outgoing than he is. I think it’s great he will just go up to his friends and start playing. However; it makes me a little uncomfortable when he wants to talk to every stranger we see. I definitely think being outgoing is another strength of his. However; I feel it has made Covid a lot harder for him. He constantly wants to play with other kids. Sadly, that is not always an option right now.
He is also very intelligent. I love reading books to him. He is so curious. He will often ask me, “What does (random thing) start with?” He is great at counting and he loves learning his letters. He has known his colors from a young age. I’m not sure if he knows all his shapes; partly because I’m horrible at drawing them. I will tell him, “this is a square.” And then realize it’s not a very good square, “Never mind, it’s a rectangle.”
I am not writing this post to brag about my son, but to remind us to notice our children’s good qualities. It can be difficult, especially while many parents are stuck at home with their kids again. Being with people 24-7 is hard. It’s even harder when it is your children who are completely dependent on you. Add to that the stress of getting them to do their school work; having to work from home; and the anxiety of illness. This is a hard time. Being with your kids all day, every day is hard. But remember to notice the good qualities along with the bad. We all have good qualities. We just need to look for them.
“Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged.” Colossians 3:21 NLT